Sarah Lolley
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Done is Better Than Perfect

5/9/2014

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I was only a few days from my due date when my editor at ELLE Canada learned that I was expecting and gave me a fantastic opportunity: to write an essay for the May issue (to coincide with Mother's Day) about entering motherhood.
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I have been publishing with ELLE Canada for years but in the past, I would write an essay on spec and then submit it for consideration. This meant that I had weeks (sometimes months) to perfect the piece, really thinking through every metaphor and turn of phrase, and ensuring that the writing was smooth and concise. I always ran the essays past my writer's group for their input and the writing was always stronger for it.

With this assignment, there wasn't time for any of the distance and reflection that perfecting requires. In fact, I only found the thread of the essay on what turned out to be the day I went into labour, and wound up writing the piece two days later, in the throes of post-partum emotion and delirious with lack of sleep.

I have long heard the mantra "Done is Better Than Perfect" but I have never been forced to apply it to my creative writing before. But this deadline was firm (and short) and I had already committed to the piece so, after a quick sanity-check reading from a friend, I sent it off.

Of course, perfectionist that I am, I only see the faults in the published piece: the clumsy metaphor, the opportunities for expansion. But readers' reactions have been overwhelmingly positive. One author I know who puts enormous emotion into everything she writes told me that this was the first piece I have ever written that made her cry. (If you would like a copy of the piece, just let me know.)

The experience was actually a good lesson in how I will have to approach creative work now that I'm a mother: after nearly a decade of prioritizing perfection over completion, done will now have to be better than perfect. And I think that will turn out to be a good thing. I have a tendency to overthink my writing.

Readers who are both parents and writers, how did your writing change after you had children?

Of course, cryptic crosswords are a different beast entirely. They demand precision in the layout and, to a certain extent, in the clues. It makes me wonder how many of the setters I have recently connected with are parents and how they have balanced the demands of parenthood (time pressure but also the lack of sleep that fuzzes up my concentration) with the rigours of setting. Anyone?

- Sarah
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    About Sarah

    I'm a writer, adventurer, amateur setter of cryptic crosswords, lover of "ah-ha!" moments, and exhausted mom.

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